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Over the past 10 years if you could identify one defining moment what would that be?


Defining moment... I suppose it would be the turning point in my life. There was a time, about six months of time, where I was the most depressed I've ever been. I was 17 years old. My best friends little sister died and she changed almost completely, so it was like I lost her too, my grandmother died, and my favorite teacher died. Topping on the cake was that a family pet died too. So much death in such a short time put a lot of stress on me, and I ended up having nightmares about some troublesome times in the past. I'd wake up in a dream thinking it was reality, wake up in reality thinking it was a dream. I went months not knowing if I was awake or asleep and being afraid of being asleep because of the nightmares that came with it. But reality wasn't much better either. My mother was stressed. For the first time in my life we got into fights, and they ended up being physical. I ran away from home. I stayed at friends houses. I wandered around the city completely lost and wondered what to do, not seeing any point to leave the place I was in...

The last dream I remember distinctly. I was alone on a dark hill, there was an oak tree behind me. It was in shadow. The leaves shifted and shook with gold outlining them. In the distance there were boiling bruised clouds, thunder, lightning. I was just sitting under the tree and crying when a shadowed man with wings came up to me. He reached out a hand and pulled me into a hug and said, "I will always be here for you." That's it. Nothing else. But it was the most comforting thing to be said to me in a while.

When I woke up I knew I'd been crying, but I felt like I'd been born again. Things were still bad, but they were able to be dealt with. I wasn't dying anymore, I was going to struggle back. It was at that point that my life turned around and I started climbing out of the hole I'd been in.

That was the moment that I knew I could conquer anything. I still have trouble with it. Sometimes I get depressed... but I know that if I can survive that point in time, I can survive anything. That was a time for building strength out of loneliness and patience out of struggle. I believe that's one very big defining moment, and it came in a dream. Funny how those things work, eh?

Comments

( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
(no subject) - minesuxe - Jun. 7th, 2011 10:10 pm (UTC) - Expand
crimsonfantasy
Jun. 9th, 2011 02:44 am (UTC)
Re: Интересный блог
I am sorry. I wish I could tell you what is missing.
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